BASTARD OPERATOR FROM HELL


Still Birthing the BOFH

So the second engineer rolls up, but the FedEx man has been and gone, so he misses out altogether.

This guy's a techno (you can tell by the tie), but he's smart (no grazes), so I'm going to have to be wary.

"What's the problem?", he asks, in a business-like manner.

"It's the model three", I say (what the hell, it worked before).

"What the f*ck's a model three?", he asks confused.

He could be just testing me, but I decide to come clean. He doesn't notice so I just walk funny for a couple of minutes and then show him the terminal that I'd poured the iron filings into.

"It just went dead!", I say (having previously vacuumed the iron filings up, of course) - My name's willy, not fucking stupid.

So anyway, he gets to work opening the cover and making board replacement noises. I decide to help and point out a fuse that's blown on the power supply board.

"Oh, I haven't got the parts for that - I've only got a replacement board.", he says in a confused manner. "Which one was the fuse again?"

I point it out to him.

"Wow! And what does it do again? You know, I've been working at the same place for 6 years, and I've never seen one of those fuse thingys. It's amazing what you learn isn't it!"

"What are you again?", I ask, already suspecting the answer.

"Chief Engineer."

Thought so.

"Say, do you know anything about waffle irons?"

"A little..."

Click

Fzzzzzzeeet!

Clunk...


And here's the next expisode: The BOFH - Part One

Previous episode

Or: Back to the index